Title: I'm a little wild
Warning: There's an abundance of Reid. I apologize in advance
Disclaimer: Don't own. Wouldn't want to tbh.
Giftee: random_nic I hope you like. Bitch you better.
Notes: Gideon's Peak and Kessler's Crossing are of course fictitious places I'm using because they sound super white. And since Oak dale was super white it seemed appropriate. Shout out to Dallas though- 1 out of 3 black people who mysteriously disappeared with no explanation. And Noah thought he had problems. Go figure.
Two weeks before Christmas.
“There’s someone in the waiting area for you” Margo says as she walks into the interrogation room. Dallas looks up a confused look on his face. “What?” He’s too tired for this, two hours in here and he couldn’t get the perp to talk.
Margo smiles at the questioning look on Dallas’ face. “Don’t worry he’s not going anywhere anytime soon, so you have time to finish up here.” Dallas still looks confused as he drops his case file and walks over to the big window that overlooks the whole police station. His eyes fall onto a figure hunched over in a chair, one hand cuffed to the arm. “What?” He says slowly breathing out, eyes going wide.
“He was caught trying to cut down a tree.” That’s Margo’s cue to start explaining, since Dallas has gone mute. Dallas turns back to her, eyes blinking. “He asked me not to tell you, but this is much more fun honestly.” She’s smiling wide and Dallas really doesn’t know what to say to that. “He wanted me to call Luke- which I did, but I don’t know how he thought he could get out of not seeing you, when he’s smack dab right in the middle of your place of work.”Dallas swallows thickly. “Where was he?”
“Kessler’s crossing” Margo says without breaking her smile. “Doesn’t he know it’s against the law to cut trees down out there?”
“Did you really have to arrest him though, you could’ve given him a warning?” It’s all he’s got as a response, because for how smart Reid is, he can still be really stupid some times.
Margo brushes a hand through her hair. “I could have, but your husband’s mouthy.” She shrugs her shoulders. “So, yeah, I did.”
Dallas takes a deep breath. He can’t argue with that.
“Reid?!” Luke rushes in to the police station, voice frantic staring at a hunch over body. “What did you do?” He falls into the chair right next to Reid and tries to tilt his head up.
Reid doesn’t say anything, just does that thing where he looks like he’s eating metal and glass. He looks angry like he’s about to yell out “I’ll have all of your badges” at any moment. Of course he doesn’t though. He just says “can you get me out of here, before Dallas sees me?” He doesn’t explain anything he never has to with Luke. He’d be here forever if it were Noah, because Noah would want a full length explanation of what he did and then want Reid to point out where in his story he went wrong and why Margo had every right to slap cuffs on him.
Before Luke can say anything else there’s a shadow looming over them. Reid can only roll his eyes and Luke just sighs like a child who’s been caught. “I think it’s too late for that, don’t you think?” Reid continues to grind on that metal and glass in his mouth while Luke looks up innocently at Dallas batting his eyes.
“What were you thinking?!” Dallas is whisper shouting as he uncuffs Reid from the chair and drags him halfway from where Luke is still sitting. Reid doesn’t say anything and Dallas' grip gets a little tighter “Reid.” There’s a warning in Dallas’ voice and Reid finally looks up, his eyes stony. “I was trying to surprise you with a real tree.” He doesn’t say anything else just looks back down. He’s a grown man that’s being chastised in public, he doesn’t want to snap at Dallas so he falls quiet.
“All the trees on the farm, you know where we live? And you go and almost get arrested for one?” Dallas sounds almost hysterical. “Do you know what tomorrow is? How would that look if you got locked up? How would you have explained that?! How would you have explained that to Noah?”
“It was supposed to be a surprise and I didn’t want anyone to see.” Reid rolls his eyes “….and I know what tomorrow is.” He still looks like he’s eating metal and glass.
Dallas sighs and steps away. “You know…… you’re supposed to be the adult in this relationship. Stop making that face.”
Reid narrows his eyes. “I’m not that much older than you detective.”
Dallas cocks an eyebrow and steps towards his husband. He brushes his full lips against Reid’s cheek. “I like when you call me that” he whispers when he reaches Reid’s ear. He quickly slaps Reid on the ass. “Now get out of here, I’ll see you when I get home.”
Reid looks a little startled. “I’m not arrested?” Dallas smirks and shakes his head. “What?”
“You could’ve avoided all of this if you learned how to keep your pretty mouth shut.”
Reid looks over into the interrogation room and sees Margo standing there with a delightful smile on her lips. She raises a hand and waves politely to him. “Sonofabitch,” he seethes.”
“Go home babe. And take your partner in crime with you.” Dallas looks over at Luke pointedly, like he can see right through him- He’s not a detective for nothing. That look puts Luke into action dragging Reid from the police station, before Reid can say anything he’ll regret.
Noah’s anxious, more anxious than usual, running his hands through his hair over and over again as he stands in front of a full length mirror. He keeps fidgeting like there’s a frog in his pants and he can’t seem to get it out. He takes a deep breath, lets it out through his nose, and then repeats. His hands reach for his hair again and- “Noah I’m going to punch you in the throat if you touch your hair one more time.”
Noah stiffens, balls his hands into fist and turns to the sound of the voice. “Now that’ll really get you locked up.” Noah doesn’t seem to be joking though, he looks as though he’s trying to contain his anger.
Reid stand’s nonchalantly in the doorway, arms crossed. He causally shrugs his shoulders…. “If it’ll get you to stop fidgeting, then so be it. You’ll probably eat through a straw from then on but….” He shrugs again causally and smiles softly at Noah.
Noah shakes his head, a small smile appearing on his lips. “You’re an asshole, you know that right?” He’s walking towards Reid now a little laugher caught in his chest, arms spread out to get a hug. Noah pulls Reid into a tight embrace. “Do you know how pissed I would’ve been if you weren’t here today?” He says as he pulls back from the embrace.
Reid steps away. “Don’t give me slack please, I’ve been hearing it from Dallas since he got home last night.”
“As you should be.” Reid rolls his eyes. “And what did you learn from this?”
A bubble of laughter escapes Reid “And this is why I called Luke.”
“What did you learn Reid?” Noah chooses to ignore Reid’s comment. “Hmmm, what did you learn?”
Reid chokes down another chuckle and looks Noah straight in the eye. “Well…for one thing I learned that Margo’s a raging bitch.” Noah’s eyes bulge out of his head and he looks as though he’s about to clutch his nonexistent pearls. "Oh for god sakes” Reid mumbles as he pulls Noah from the room. “Let’s go, it’s time to get you married.”
“…then by the power vested in me, I now-” before the minister can even finish his sentence Luke is pulling Noah towards him, kissing him like he’s never kissed him before; one of his hands sliding down Noah’s back smacking him hard on his butt.
“I couldn’t wait any longer,” he says as he pulls back. The crowd is applauding, some even laughing. And all Luke and Noah can do is smile stupidly at each other.
“Impatient bastard!” Reid hollers out as he claps from his place on the alter beside Noah.
Luke giggles and winks at Noah. “That I am.”
Casey, Luke’s best man smacks him on his back. “You sly dog you. Get it boy!”
“So tell me Mr. Mayer.”
Luke’s eyes light up at the sound of Noah’s voice, the way he says the name. He has his arms around Noah’s shoulders, their bodies moving slowly on the dance floor and he sighs softly. “I like the way that sounds.”
“You do, do you?”
“Mmm hmmm.” Luke’s nodding slowly, smiling up at Noah.
Noah can’t help but Nuzzle his face into Luke’s neck. “So….” Noah says still nuzzling into Luke’s neck. “When were you going to tell me Reid got arrested?”
Luke pulls away, a sweet smile on his lips. “Never” he says calmly. He doesn’t look sorry either. Noah glares at him a little and Luke sighs. “He wasn’t even really arrested.”
“…. But if he had been, I would’ve posted bail.”
“Noah,” it wasn’t a big deal and I didn’t want you to worry and start to freak out thinking your best man wouldn’t make it to your wedding.” Luke knows Noah like the back of his own hand. He knows he’d start to think the worst, take it as a sign. “So yeah, I would’ve bailed him out and not have told you.” Luke shrugs. “Sue me.”
Noah looks like he has a lot to say behind that, but he doesn’t want to have a disagreement with Luke on their wedding day. Besides he knows Luke and he knows he’ll never change. “Why would Reid go to Kessler’s crossing anyway?” Noah says instead, brow wrinkling. “Everyone knows you go to Gideon’s Peak for trees. It’s a few miles out bu…..” Noah trails off and looks down at Luke- Luke who has gone dead silent.
At that moment something dawns on Noah and he gives Luke a suspicious, but all too knowing look. “You didn’t.” Luke doesn’t look up and Noah sighs. “Yep! You did.” Noah’s about to go full on into one of his speeches about right and wrong, but stops suddenly feeling the way Luke’s body shakes under him. “Well then, I guess I shouldn’t even bother.”
Luke finally looks up, eyes bright, mouth in a tight line trying to hold in his laugh. “I couldn’t help myself. You know…. for a doctor he can be really dense.” Luke is still trying to contain his laughter and Noah is still looking at him. “On come on Noah! There are signs, he should’ve known.” Luke sighs because Noah, is well Noah. “It’s a well-known fact for Christ sake. I didn’t think he’d actually go.” He still looks like he’s seconds away from laughing. “Plus, I knew deputy Hanson would be out there. And I just….” Luke trails off to stop himself from laughing out loud. “He was safe, so it’s okay.” He finally gets out.
“Yeah, except it wasn’t Hanson Luke, it was Margo. Hence why he ended up at the police station.”
“That wasn’t my fault. Reid doesn’t know when to shut up.” Noah would like to point out how it is Luke’s fault; that the whole situation could’ve been avoided if Luke would’ve just been a normal human being. But Noah doesn’t want to point that out. Instead he says “when Reid realizes….” Noah shakes his head slowly.
“Oh come on, you know you’ll protect me.”
Noah shakes his head quick. “Nope you will have deserved it.”
Luke smiles shyly up at Noah. “I’m your husband now, you have to protect me, and you’re obligated to now. You’d be wise to remember that.” Luke is still smiling up at him when suddenly there’s a finger jabbing him in his shoulder. He knows who it is before he even turns around from the look on Noah’s face. “Reid” he says batting his lashes. He looks over Reid’s shoulder to see Dallas standing there grinning. “Dallas.” A look passes between them and Luke knows Dallas was just waiting for Reid to catch up. “Ah, you enjoying yourself?” Dallas just stares at him, an amused look on his face.
“Enough with the chit chat” Reid says with a cutting tone. He steps right into Luke’s space. “I can’t kill you here.” He shrugs his shoulders causally. “That’s some bad mojo I don’t want no part off.” He smiles devilishly at Luke though “….But tomorrow- that’s why you got your butt down to that police station so fast.” Reid takes a deep breath. “I don’t know what I’m going to do, but-” Dallas is dragging him away now. “Watch your back Snyder” is the last thing Reid gets out.
And all Luke can say in return is “its Mayer now. Call me Mayer when you come for me.” Luke turns back to Noah to see him laughing freely. “I’m right aren’t I? I mean if I’m going to die, he could at least get that right.”
Noah pulls Luke into his body and hugs him tight, mouth going to his ear. “I love you. You’re a little shit but I love you.”
Luke cuffs Noah on the back of the head. “Be nice mister.”
An upbeat song starts to play and the crowd around them dancing gets fuller. “You want to get out of here Mr. Mayer?” Luke puts his hand out waiting.
Noah grabs Luke by the hand “lead the way.”